Heavy Hearts

It is with a heavy heart that I write today that Frostie’s cycle did not work out and we are not pregnant after Round 2 of IVF. Our one and only frozen embryo is gone. There aren’t really any words to describe what that feels like except that we are devastated.

The list of questions that I have is a million miles long right now. We’ve decided to take a break for the rest of 2016 and pick back up treatment in 2017. I will say that it was incredibly kind of my RE to call me directly to deliver the bad news, I’ve always had a nurse call and give it to me. I’ll be making a consult for sometime in December to go over next steps- which I’m assuming will include genetic screening for any future embryos that we might get.

Right now, we’re also trying to figure out what our limits are- it’s now pretty clear that not being able to have biological children is a real possibility for us and neither of us is sure how we feel about that. Physically, I think I could take a couple of more rounds of IVF and since we are lucky enough to live in a state that mandates fertility coverage, that’s an option, but emotionally, this is… A lot. To say the least.

While we’re doing our treatment break, we’ve decided to take dedicate November to a Month of Me. We’re going to live life like the young married couple that we are- sans all of the grief and stress that comes along with infertility. We’re going to practice self-care in some way or another every day and use the time surrounding the holidays to refocus on ourselves and each other. I hope to post a few times about what we’re doing in case anyone else would like some ideas on how to try and recover from a failed cycle.

Thank you so much for your well wishes and support during my FET, I’m incredibly grateful.

North of Wrigley (1)

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5 thoughts on “Heavy Hearts

  1. akblueberry says:

    I’m so very sorry that it didn’t work and that you are going through this loss. I know the pain you both are going through as we were there in August – 2nd round of IVF and our one and only embryo didn’t result in pregnancy. I have never been so devastated in my life. We have been on the same plan as you are going on – taking time for us and not moving forward with another cycle until 2017. It has been a great break to reconnect with both my husband and myself the last two months.

    I wish you the best on this very difficult journey.

    Liked by 1 person

    • northofwrigley says:

      Thank you so much for sharing your story with me. It sucks that we have to go through this but it helps to know I’m not alone. Thank you for the well wishes and I wish you all the best as well! Fingers crossed for babies in the new year for both of us 🙂

      Like

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